Mallory’s Birth Story by Annemarie

Posted in: Us- Jan 29, 2015 6 Comments

{If you’re here just for the pictures….scroll down.  They’re after a bunch of text.}  🙂

So, I think Mallory’s birth story actually started a while before she was born. With my first two pregnancies, I never once thought that I was “done” with being pregnant, and even up until the days before they were born, I was saying that I was comfortable staying pregnant for as long as it took and that they boys could come whenever they were ready. How different this pregnancy has been. I really can’t recall when I first felt it, maybe it was after we had the visit to the ER at 17 weeks, but for some reason I got it in my head that she was going to come early. And so, when I started to feel really terrible in the 3rd trimester, with body aches, pelvic pains, severe discomfort and pressure, I think that I was truly hoping that she would come early.

I didn’t want her to come too early, though, because, really, I already had it all planned out. At the end of 37 weeks, I had a MOPS Steering Retreat, and so I wanted to get through that. At the end of 38 weeks, Brett and I had a planned date night to the Josh Garrels concert, so I wanted to get through that. And then, the next day, we had family pictures planned with Emily, and that was something that I really wanted to do, so, after that was done, I told her that she could come anytime. But…I still was pregnant. People were asking me daily if she was here yet. Daily. I looked like I was about to have her any day. I felt like I could, with all the pressure and what felt like her falling out at any moment. With as quickly as Blake was born, I was kind of nervous to go anywhere in fear that she might actually come and seriously fall out at any time, so most days we stuck pretty close to home, or didn’t leave at all, which made the waiting that much more painstaking.

Well, she didn’t come. She waited. 39 weeks came and went. Then 40 weeks came and went too. Both 40 weeks. We had one 40 weeks due date on Sunday, and another on Wednesday – depending on what you use to calculate due date. We had been using Sundays the entire pregnancy because it was easier to remember, and Brett didn’t want me to clutter up our calendar with the reminders. 🙂 So, when we passed the Wednesday due date, we were really officially past 40 weeks. I started to wonder how much longer I would be able to mentally take. I had an appointment on Wednesday with Laurel, and for the first time with any of my pregnancies, I actually asked for her to check me. She said that I was about 80% effaced and 1cm dilated, which was good to know, but I did know that it really, honestly, didn’t mean much as to when things would get started. She just commented that when they did start, things would probably progress quickly (again).

So, we kept up life as usual, and I tried my best to keep my sanity. I have never, in my life, been so anxious, for anything in my entire life. I had put away all my projects weeks before, setup my craft room as a second guest room, the house was clean, the underneath of all the sinks were organized, there was literally nothing left for me to do. Each night I went to sleep, I would wake up and notice that the clock was past about 4 or 5am, I would feel disappointment that she hadn’t come in the night and we’d have to wait another day. You see, I also had it in my head that she wasn’t going to come during the day as I just didn’t see my body going in to labor while the boys were awake and needed my care. So, we went to our Homegroup get together on Wednesday night at Rusty’s Pizza with some of the other families, and all the screaming kids, and had a good time.

After we got the kids to bed, I asked Brett to give me a foot rub. You know, because it is known to be one of those methods to induce labor, with the pressure points. Well, no labor started, and I was tired, so I went ahead and went off to bed. When I left the living room, I remember telling Brett that I was feeling uncomfortable. He said, “So, what does that mean, are you in labor?”. I told him no, and I would let him know. He came in to tuck me in, and then said, “I just need you to tell me when it’s actually happening, and not all of the stuff that you’re feeling. Work is stressful, then I come home, and it’s stressful with not knowing, and I just want to know when it’s starts”.  I totally understood that sentiment, as the last few weeks, besides being anxious in anticipation, I was also a little nervous about what labor was going to be like. The two that we’d been through already were SO completely different, 18 hours versus 1 hour 25 minutes, so I had NO idea what to expect!! Even that night, Brett also said to me, “Are you sure you’re really ready for this?”, to which I replied, “I have no idea!!”.

When I went to sleep, baby girl was digging and rooting around in the birth canal, and I was feeling some sharp pains from her movements, but it wasn’t anything to keep me from falling asleep, so I did. Brett worked pretty late, and when he finally came in, for some reason, he was so on edge, that with every strange breath or movement I made, he was saying, “You ok?”. I told him that he needed to chill out, and get sleep, and that if I needed him, I would definitely let him know. This was definitely odd behavior from him, as most of the time, once his head hits the pillow, he is completely dead to the world. He must have known something was going to happen.

Well, something did happen. All of the sudden I felt and heard a loud pop! Seconds later I felt a rush and knew it was my water breaking. I said, “Brett, my water just broke”, and he leaped out of bed. I asked him what time it was, to which he responded, 4:32am. Lights on, and he said, let’s call the midwives. I hesitated for just a moment, knowing that just because my water broke, didn’t mean automatically that labor would begin, but then said that we should just so they have a heads up. I went straight to the bathroom, and more of my “water” kept spilling out. Brett called, and Laurel answered. He told her what had happened, she asked if contractions had started yet, and said to call back once they picked up. Emily had woken up for some reason right at 430am, and when she went to the bathroom, she saw the lights were on, and got super excited. “Is it time?”. Brett and Emily took a moment, and prayed over me and then we got started. I thought that the contractions were about to start, so I went to the toilet. I definitely had to go, and my body had started to work on getting everything out before baby was coming. So, things were definitely reminiscent of Blake’s birth already. Brett and Emily made the bed, put on the plastic drop cloth, and made it up again with another set of sheets. They brought in all of the things we had all ready in the hall closet for the birth, and let me do my thing in the bathroom. At 455am, the contractions started to pick up where I jotted them down. 459am. 504am. 507am. 509am. 512am. 514am. 516am. 518am. They were two minutes apart, and crazy intense, so fast! In the middle of that, I had Brett call Laurel back, and she said she was already on her way. At one point, Brett was trying to help me get undressed to prep for the impending birth, and I couldn’t speak, but instead just waved him off heavily, and then when I was ready for his help, I had to use hand motions again as I just really couldn’t put words together. The contractions were so close that I barely had a break in-between each coming one.

Laurel arrived somewhere around 515ish, I think, and she just calmly starting setting up the things that she needed for our birth. I muttered some kind of greeting, and was able to get out the word “pressure”, letting her know what I was feeling. She wasn’t surprised by that from hearing me, she didn’t even have to check me, and asked if I would like to get to the bed. I somehow told her that I felt like I still had to keep going to the bathroom, to which she said, “Honey, that’s the baby.”. So, dang, that was quick. I really wasn’t sure I could make it the 10 feet to the bed, and I honestly didn’t even want to move, but I agreed, and she and Brett each grabbed under an arm, and helped me to the bed. I didn’t want to even put any added pressure on my feet, so I almost let them carry me there. I made it close enough to where I could throw my body down sideways. She said I could push whenever I was ready, and I think I asked Laurel a few times to confirm that was the case. So, I started to push, very slowly and controlled, as I didn’t want to tear, and even without the contractions. Once you know how to push a baby out, it’s a feeling you don’t ever forget, so I knew that I knew what to do, but wowzers, it was hard.

As I mentioned, I didn’t want to rush it, so I was doing my best to push slowly and intentionally. All of the sudden I felt her head out, and then with another push, she was here. She has her hand up on her face when she came out. 533am. Baby was here, and in my arms. One hour and one minute after my water broke, and only 38 minutes after active labor started. WHAT? I was in such shock, and even though she laid right there on my belly, I just laid there, and I couldn’t even look at her for about 5 minutes. Don’t get me wrong, I am most appreciative for a quick labor, but that was so fast, and so intense, that I just needed a moment to let it all soak in.

Emily, who was ready with her camera to capture some photos of our birth, was standing in the hallway, making sure that the boys didn’t wake up or come out of their room. She popped her head back in right at 533am, and was in complete shock that the baby was already here. She caught a photo literally right as Laurel was pulling her out and up to my belly. She missed it, and she was right outside the door. A few minutes later, Anna and Alissa showed up too. Alissa was so bummed to miss it too, and said that she hadn’t ever been so sad to live up where she did as she just couldn’t get here fast enough.

We introduced her to our midwives, our little Mallory Anne Bollman. It felt surreal to finally say her name out loud and tell people. Brett and I were beaming and so proud. Our daughter….our DAUGHTER….was here. She was healthy, pink, beautiful and ours!

After a little while, I delivered the placenta, and everything felt a lot better. But then, about 15 minutes after she was born, I started to shake uncontrollably. I got super cold and asked Brett to get me some socks, the midwives put blankets and towels on me, and they were able to get it under control. No idea what brought that on, but that was new – and the socks were a totally good look for me.

At 555am, Brett cut her cord, and then we just laid there for a little while hanging out and laying close. Daddy and I just admired and fell more in love with Mallory. A little bit after 6am, Brett and Alissa got Mallory all setup for her cord to be prepped, and it turns out that she had already had her first poop. Surprise! So, they got her all cleaned up, put on a diaper, and then she was given back to me. We tried to nurse, and she latched right on. Then, afterwards, for the first time, I got a good look at her. She looked a lot like Blake when he was born.

A little less than an hour after Mallory was born, everything from the birth was all cleaned up, and it was time for Laurel to get home and get back to sleep. She’d been pretty busy this week already, ours was the 3rd birth, and the other two were pretty long ones, so she smiled for our group picture, gave us love and hugs, and we sent her on her way. She has been part of all of our births, which is so amazing. She will always have such a special place in our hearts. Anna and Alissa finished up with us on everything else.

Laurel and Anna, two of our amazing midwives.

It was time to get the vitals and give Mallory a good once over. Alissa got her belly button all tied off, and then it was time to weigh and measure.

She weighed in at 8 pounds and 2 ounces and measured 21 inches tall at birth. She has a head of light brown hair and her eyes are deep blue. Her toes and fingers are super long and skinny, and she has a small head.

This sweet time, with our wonderful loving midwives, Mommy and Daddy with our baby girl, in the place we call home…this is why we choose to have our births the way we do.  I couldnt ‘t imagine it any other way and consider us very blessed that we get to do birth this way.  We had some time to just soak her in before the craziness of the day started.

We made a few FaceTime calls during this time to share our news with family. We caught my Mom and we got all weepy when we got to tell her our daughter’s name. Those moments are the reason why we love to wait to tell our babys’ names, and introduce her properly to our friends and family. We couldn’t do it without tearing up the first few times. We got ahold of my sister, Erika, Brett’s sister, Autumn, and finally Brett’s parents too! Auntie Taylor was already at school, so we had to catch up with her later that day.

Mallory had her Vitamin K shot and didn’t even make a peep.  Brave girl.  🙂  Aunt Emmy got to hold her, and then after that she was pretty much ready to come back to Mommy and stay in my arms.

Since it was a Thursday, Burke had Preschool, and so at 730am, we decided it was probably time to wake up Mallory’s brothers and tell them the big news!  Brett went to get them out of bed, and told them that he had a surprise. He walked them down the hall, and with great anticipation, came around the corner of the door, and into our room.

At 733am, 2 hours after she was born, the boys met their baby sister. Burke knew immediately what was up, and told Daddy that his surprise was his “new baby sister”. He was so excited that he leaned over and gave Blake a huge hug around his neck. Blake was a little mesmerized and confused by all the people that were in Mommy & Daddy’s room, that he didn’t really appreciate what a huge moment this was for him. He had just graduated from youngest to big brother, and all of the sudden he was our middle child.

Daddy tried to put Blake next to me, but he wasn’t having it, immediately started to cry, and so Brett scooped him back up. Burke, on the other hand, couldn’t wait to get in close, take a look and give her some kisses.

Burke was so incredibly sweet, and so so so proud. They boys went to eat breakfast, and with mostly Emily’s help, Burke managed to make it to school on time. He was so excited to tell his class about his new baby sister, who he called “Calorie” a few times. A few of the other Moms texted me and told me how cute and proud Burke was of his sister, which made my heart smile.  Brett and Blake played while Mommy and Mallory slept.

What a wild ride. I can’t believe that she is here. It seemed like she took forever to come, but don’t you know, that God’s perfect timing was indeed just that, perfect. We are so thrilled that Mallory Anne Bollman joined our family on Thursday, January 29, 2015 at 533am.

We are Bollman, Party of 5.

6 Responses to “Mallory’s Birth Story”

  1. Mom says:

    That brought tears to my eyes…again. Tears of happiness and joy. Anxiously waiting when we will meet sweet Mallory Anne in March.

  2. Irelle says:

    What an absolutely wonderful incredible story. Couldn’t get through it without tears in my eyes and I’m not even related! You are a special family! So glad I know you! Congrats to the Bollman Party of FIVE!

  3. Liz says:

    What a beautifully told, beautiful story of a beautiful family!! A genuine treat to read and to celebrate along with you!
    Wishing all five of you a lifetime of shared adventures, learning experiences, and much love and good health!
    xox

  4. Remi says:

    This is so incredibly beautiful, Annemarie. I was definitely tearing up at the pictures of Burke’s JOY!

  5. marisa says:

    so so crazy!! and a little head – no wonder she flew out! 😉 the end makes it all worth it, doesn’t it? just the best present after all that suffering! can’t wait to meet her too!

  6. Mom Bollman says:

    You are amazing to share your incredible stories with us! You are patient, brave, smart, and loving. I am so blessed to have you be the mother of my three Bollman grandchildren! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! We love you!